I've been asking this question myself many times lately...
via http://joemygod.blogspot.com/
Showing posts with label Sarcasm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sarcasm. Show all posts
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
‘Tis the season
There’s not much to report at this time as George and I are extremely busy with work, classes and everything in-between. The weeks and days leading up to the holidays were always a busy time for me. For whatever reason everyone thinks that the business world will be coming to an end if employees actually have a day or two off. Couple those days with a weekend and Capitalism as we know it truly comes to a complete standstill.
On top of that, I have the audacity to take a vacation. The nerve of me! Now everyone at my company is completely panicking and throws every imaginable project at me to finish before I leave for my vacation. You know, in case our plane nose-dives into the Atlantic or we decide to ask for political asylum in Germany or something like that. At least all my company’s projects will have been taken care of before I’m off donning some lederhosen and joining a yodeling group.
‘Tis the season after all.
Next Monday our friends Rover and Cal will be spending a few days for a romantic getaway at the Encore in Las Vegas. We’re looking forward to seeing them again, having a nice dinner together and a few good laughs. Then it’s time to slowly prepare for our upcoming trip to Germany. Departure day will be here before you know it and I’ll probably forget to pack something important.
Like my passport.
Below are a few random shots. An amazing sunrise after a night of blistering winter storms. A close-up of some holiday lights we’ve put on our mantle at home and an older picture of me when I was still a graphic artist at KSR/Snapdragon Interactive. That was by far the best job one could ever ask for. I still miss it.
Do you think I was trying too hard to look cool in this last picture?
On top of that, I have the audacity to take a vacation. The nerve of me! Now everyone at my company is completely panicking and throws every imaginable project at me to finish before I leave for my vacation. You know, in case our plane nose-dives into the Atlantic or we decide to ask for political asylum in Germany or something like that. At least all my company’s projects will have been taken care of before I’m off donning some lederhosen and joining a yodeling group.
‘Tis the season after all.
Next Monday our friends Rover and Cal will be spending a few days for a romantic getaway at the Encore in Las Vegas. We’re looking forward to seeing them again, having a nice dinner together and a few good laughs. Then it’s time to slowly prepare for our upcoming trip to Germany. Departure day will be here before you know it and I’ll probably forget to pack something important.
Like my passport.
Below are a few random shots. An amazing sunrise after a night of blistering winter storms. A close-up of some holiday lights we’ve put on our mantle at home and an older picture of me when I was still a graphic artist at KSR/Snapdragon Interactive. That was by far the best job one could ever ask for. I still miss it.
Do you think I was trying too hard to look cool in this last picture?
Friday, November 13, 2009
Nice Weather, Isn’t It?
The weather forecasters predicted a cold front sweeping into the Las Vegas Valley this weekend and bringing with it apocalyptic high winds of “2012” proportions. And...gasp...rain! Now they’re saying that the weather will pretty much stay the same as it has been for the last few days...balmy 70°, sunny with some high clouds.
Have you noticed that the weather dudes and dudettes never get it right anymore? Not too long ago, the weather forecasts seemed to have been fairly accurate. I was always amazed by that. Now however, it seems that weather forecasts are merely fillers for subconscious advertising or to show off another over-the-top made up Barbie doll face.
With all the advanced computer technology and warning systems placed around the globe, one would think we should be able to pinpoint where every single rain drop will hit the ground by now. Instead, things have gotten backwards somehow.
But I think I’ve figured out what the problem is. The more modern technology progresses the more stupid the human race becomes. In return, humans are programming their stupidity back into computers and their applications.
For example, have you seen the millions of iPhone Apps that are floating around out there? An App for Starbucks? A Wal-Mart App? What is this stupid thing suppose to do? Will it do the shopping for your already way-too-lazy-ass? Is it going to forklift you to a certain shopping aisle or maybe even wiping your butt so you don’t have to waste any time to check your text messages while running over a couple of your fellow shoppers with your forklift?
Shouldn’t we be further ahead with the advancement of technology and science to make this a more livable place? Oh wait...let me rephrase that. Shouldn’t America be a little further along? Because the rest of the world has already whisked way past us at light speed. While Americans are still all goggle-eyed about what pretty things a useless iPhone App can do, other nations are reaping in the rewards on their investments in environmental technologies to make tomorrow’s world more efficient and cleaner. Or how about other countries’ achievements in the medical field to find cures to eradicate serious illnesses?
Here, a lot of Americans still believe that universal health care is some form of evil communist devil worship that wants to destroy the holier-than-thou tradition of deep-fried Twinkies. Because that‘s what wiped out Europe. Not the Twinkies but that evil health care system which seems to be working pretty well for those hoity-toity Europeans. Do they not deep-fry croissants over there?
Oy!
Now on with our regular programming...
What America also still doesn’t realize is that scientific research and development in the renewable energy and medical area, as well as implementing new technologies is where the future lies...and eventually wealth and prosperity. And isn’t that what America so desperately seeks? But in this country the clueless sheep are still led by a few wolves in form of religious dimwits and greedy conglomerates, constantly screwing their flock over and over again while proclaiming it’s done for God and Country. Therefore all is well in America. And God said so too when he was personally interviewed by Rush Limbsack and Glenn Fuck on Faux News the other day.
Yesterday I said that I was happy on my Facebook page. Nothing has changed, despite my little frustrating rant above. I’m still very happy. How can I not be? I have the most loving person in my life. We have a wonderful home together. I even love America, believe it or not. It’s a great country, even though some Americans are out to destroy the few remaining good things and lay all the blame on us gays for the apocalypse.
Or are they blaming Germans again? The disaster porn flick “2012” was directed by a German director after all.
Shouldn’t Germans be happier too? Especially 20 years after that darned wall came down? Well, don’t get me started on that little chapter in history. I have my own little tale to tell from that event back in 1989. But that would take too long and turn into another rant.
Besides, I am happy. Remember?
What was this entry about again? I forget. Who cares? It’s Friday and the weekend is upon us. So don’t worry and be happy.
Have a great weekend, ya’ll. Only two more years until the end of the world.
Have you noticed that the weather dudes and dudettes never get it right anymore? Not too long ago, the weather forecasts seemed to have been fairly accurate. I was always amazed by that. Now however, it seems that weather forecasts are merely fillers for subconscious advertising or to show off another over-the-top made up Barbie doll face.
With all the advanced computer technology and warning systems placed around the globe, one would think we should be able to pinpoint where every single rain drop will hit the ground by now. Instead, things have gotten backwards somehow.
But I think I’ve figured out what the problem is. The more modern technology progresses the more stupid the human race becomes. In return, humans are programming their stupidity back into computers and their applications.
For example, have you seen the millions of iPhone Apps that are floating around out there? An App for Starbucks? A Wal-Mart App? What is this stupid thing suppose to do? Will it do the shopping for your already way-too-lazy-ass? Is it going to forklift you to a certain shopping aisle or maybe even wiping your butt so you don’t have to waste any time to check your text messages while running over a couple of your fellow shoppers with your forklift?
Shouldn’t we be further ahead with the advancement of technology and science to make this a more livable place? Oh wait...let me rephrase that. Shouldn’t America be a little further along? Because the rest of the world has already whisked way past us at light speed. While Americans are still all goggle-eyed about what pretty things a useless iPhone App can do, other nations are reaping in the rewards on their investments in environmental technologies to make tomorrow’s world more efficient and cleaner. Or how about other countries’ achievements in the medical field to find cures to eradicate serious illnesses?
Here, a lot of Americans still believe that universal health care is some form of evil communist devil worship that wants to destroy the holier-than-thou tradition of deep-fried Twinkies. Because that‘s what wiped out Europe. Not the Twinkies but that evil health care system which seems to be working pretty well for those hoity-toity Europeans. Do they not deep-fry croissants over there?
Oy!
Now on with our regular programming...
What America also still doesn’t realize is that scientific research and development in the renewable energy and medical area, as well as implementing new technologies is where the future lies...and eventually wealth and prosperity. And isn’t that what America so desperately seeks? But in this country the clueless sheep are still led by a few wolves in form of religious dimwits and greedy conglomerates, constantly screwing their flock over and over again while proclaiming it’s done for God and Country. Therefore all is well in America. And God said so too when he was personally interviewed by Rush Limbsack and Glenn Fuck on Faux News the other day.
Yesterday I said that I was happy on my Facebook page. Nothing has changed, despite my little frustrating rant above. I’m still very happy. How can I not be? I have the most loving person in my life. We have a wonderful home together. I even love America, believe it or not. It’s a great country, even though some Americans are out to destroy the few remaining good things and lay all the blame on us gays for the apocalypse.
Or are they blaming Germans again? The disaster porn flick “2012” was directed by a German director after all.
Shouldn’t Germans be happier too? Especially 20 years after that darned wall came down? Well, don’t get me started on that little chapter in history. I have my own little tale to tell from that event back in 1989. But that would take too long and turn into another rant.
Besides, I am happy. Remember?
What was this entry about again? I forget. Who cares? It’s Friday and the weekend is upon us. So don’t worry and be happy.
Have a great weekend, ya’ll. Only two more years until the end of the world.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Change is Good...Not!
As I mentioned in the last entry on Friday, George and I were looking forward to enjoying burgers at our neighborhood bar right after work and spending Saturday hiking in wonderful Red Rock Canyon.
Well, none of our plans fully materialized.
In my last entry I’ve also touted that the burgers served at O’Aces Bar & Grill, our local dive around the corner from where we live, are one of the best burgers in town. Well, make that were...as in past tense.
History! Kaputt! Nix mehr!
Fine then! We just make our own burgers in the future. So...there!
They have renovated the place. Unfortunately, it seemed as if they’ve not only renovated the dining area but also made some changes to their kitchen and the staff.
Their burgers used to be fresh and juicy, made to order with a flavor to die for. What we got on Friday evening was anything but. Dry, tasteless, smallish are the best decriptions I can come up with. Did we accidently walk into a joint of these indistinguishable fast food chains? Seriously, we couldn’t believe this travesty. What happened to that “I just died and went to heaven” flavor?
Oh, that’s right. They renovated...upgraded...improved. In order to cover these expenses they’ve started to cut corners on quality and quantity of food and probably hired a new, less-experienced cook. Not only was the food bad, they also served smaller portions. And on top of that they charged two dollars more per plate.
Be aware of “renovations.” Or “re-designed” packaging. Or “new” and “improved” flavors. That usually means that a product, whatever it may be, is now being produced with cheaper materials or ingredients. Miraculously, the contents inside the “re-invented” packaging always seems to be getting smaller. And of course the prices have increased too. You know, the costs of these so-called “improvements” must be recovered somehow.
But everything is just so much better now!
Or so they’d like us to believe.
Ahhh, insidious and schemed greed. It’s still alive and well in a country inhabited by drone-like people whom never question anything, taking everything for granted and just want to maintain the status quo. It’s so much more convenient this way.
Sorry, we don’t play that game. O’Aces has seen the last of us. And why do people always have a need to “fix” things that don’t need fixing. Sometimes change is not good. Not good at all! It’s too bad though because O’Aces had something really good going for them.
Geez, who would’ve guessed I’d get so bitter over a darn cheeseburger?
Red Rock Canyon - the way it should have been.
Our hiking trip to Red Rock Canyon also hit a little snag on Saturday morning. It was just too stormy outside. George and I decided to do some house cleaning instead and also caught up on movies which we’ve recorded over the last few weeks. Yesterday the weather decided to be particularly grey and dreary. The temperature dropped by twenty degrees. We still took a walk in our park but had to cut it short due to more gusty winds and unexpected sudden rain.
Not quite the weekend we had planned for. But there’s always another one coming up. And next weekend...come rain or shine...we’re off to Disneyland in Anaheim, California. It’s George’s birthday on Friday and the Disney folks grant free admission to everyone whom visits the Magic Kingdom on their birthdays. We’ll be meeting with George’s brother and his girlfriend and make a funtabulous day out of it.
California...here we come!
Besides, we’re in desperate need of another Disney fix. Our last trip to Walt Disney World in Florida has already been over five months ago.
And a Disney fan can only stay away from the House of Mouse for so long.
Well, none of our plans fully materialized.
In my last entry I’ve also touted that the burgers served at O’Aces Bar & Grill, our local dive around the corner from where we live, are one of the best burgers in town. Well, make that were...as in past tense.
History! Kaputt! Nix mehr!
Fine then! We just make our own burgers in the future. So...there!
They have renovated the place. Unfortunately, it seemed as if they’ve not only renovated the dining area but also made some changes to their kitchen and the staff.
Their burgers used to be fresh and juicy, made to order with a flavor to die for. What we got on Friday evening was anything but. Dry, tasteless, smallish are the best decriptions I can come up with. Did we accidently walk into a joint of these indistinguishable fast food chains? Seriously, we couldn’t believe this travesty. What happened to that “I just died and went to heaven” flavor?
Oh, that’s right. They renovated...upgraded...improved. In order to cover these expenses they’ve started to cut corners on quality and quantity of food and probably hired a new, less-experienced cook. Not only was the food bad, they also served smaller portions. And on top of that they charged two dollars more per plate.
Be aware of “renovations.” Or “re-designed” packaging. Or “new” and “improved” flavors. That usually means that a product, whatever it may be, is now being produced with cheaper materials or ingredients. Miraculously, the contents inside the “re-invented” packaging always seems to be getting smaller. And of course the prices have increased too. You know, the costs of these so-called “improvements” must be recovered somehow.
But everything is just so much better now!
Or so they’d like us to believe.
Ahhh, insidious and schemed greed. It’s still alive and well in a country inhabited by drone-like people whom never question anything, taking everything for granted and just want to maintain the status quo. It’s so much more convenient this way.
Sorry, we don’t play that game. O’Aces has seen the last of us. And why do people always have a need to “fix” things that don’t need fixing. Sometimes change is not good. Not good at all! It’s too bad though because O’Aces had something really good going for them.
Geez, who would’ve guessed I’d get so bitter over a darn cheeseburger?
Red Rock Canyon - the way it should have been.
Our hiking trip to Red Rock Canyon also hit a little snag on Saturday morning. It was just too stormy outside. George and I decided to do some house cleaning instead and also caught up on movies which we’ve recorded over the last few weeks. Yesterday the weather decided to be particularly grey and dreary. The temperature dropped by twenty degrees. We still took a walk in our park but had to cut it short due to more gusty winds and unexpected sudden rain.
Not quite the weekend we had planned for. But there’s always another one coming up. And next weekend...come rain or shine...we’re off to Disneyland in Anaheim, California. It’s George’s birthday on Friday and the Disney folks grant free admission to everyone whom visits the Magic Kingdom on their birthdays. We’ll be meeting with George’s brother and his girlfriend and make a funtabulous day out of it.
California...here we come!
Besides, we’re in desperate need of another Disney fix. Our last trip to Walt Disney World in Florida has already been over five months ago.
And a Disney fan can only stay away from the House of Mouse for so long.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Typical Americanian
Isn’t the American education system great? There are kids out there who actually are less informed than this ditzy character from the “Luann” comic strip, which appeared on Sunday. At least Tiffany, the comic character, knows that there is some war going on in a land called Iranistan and wants to bring the troops back home.
Noble...I guess.
Most children in the United States of Delusions don’t even know we’re at war. Well, not really. War was never officially declared by the U.S., but that’s another story. Many children don’t even know what 9/11 was about. I wish I was kidding but I have heard it with my own ears. Is it any surprise that most children can’t even find their own country on a world map? Since most kids attending American schools are already kind of dumb anyway, let’s cut the budget for education even further.
Besides, what is really the benefit in knowing where one’s own country is located? Or Iranistan? I was reading in Homer’s blog the other day that some Republican politician in Arizona was quoted saying: “Education does not create jobs.”
Wow!
Am I shocked? Yes. Am I surprised? No. Again I wonder why there isn’t more of an outrage about such a comment. I guess a career in flipping burgers and barely making minimum wage is every American’s dream. Americans will fight to the death for the useless right to bear arms but won’t move a finger to achieve something beneficial like...oh, let’s say...having universal health care for every single citizen. I forgot to mention that health care too is a “privilege” in this country. Some Republican politician said so on TV a few days ago.
In most of the industrialized nations around the world, free access to education and health care is an undisputed basic human right. In the United States of Cluelessness people have the right to own big guns and beat up gay people.
Is this a great country or what?
Friday, December 19, 2008
Curse these tree huggers!
Damn environmentalists! Now they have managed to even fuck up Christmas.
And global warming my ass too. Snow in the desert? Oh, the irony. Got my flight booked on Hawaiian Airlines to get me out of this arctic hell called Vegas.
Danke schön, mein Hasi. You made my day :) Oh, just to make sure...I'm being sarcastic here. Nowadays one never knows how people react to harmless little jokes. Whatever, I've been condemned to hell by all these religious wingnuts anyway. At least there will be no snow, right?
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